Today I am participating in a new series called Blogger Confessions**. Topic of the day... Relationships. Now, I don't claim to be an expert in relationships by any stretch of the imagination. I have however, been in a loving relationship for the past 6 1/2 years (read more about the mushiness here) and can draw on my experiences with that to share a few tidbits of wisdom. These are also pieces of advice that we are still learning/ working on.
- Relationships evolve. Hopefully they evolve for the better, but regardless, a relationship is not a K-12 process with undergrad/ grad school optional. In a relationship you should continually be working to improve that relationship. Ok, maybe you can "pass" Communication 101, aka getting him to call you back within a day, but you will never get a degree in Communication. I can almost guarantee that this is an aspect of your relationship you will be continually working on. The longer you have been together, those issues and aspects may change, but you will hopefully continually be working together to improve your relationship.
- Teamwork. Not everything has to be equal or even (this was hard for me to understand as a Libra, someone obsessed with fairness). In a relationship, the end result is not for individual gain or to get ahead of your partner, but mutual gain. What I mean by not everything has to be even is, you don't have to do equal amounts of chores or relationship/ household tasks. Play to your strengths. I'm somewhat OCD and love planning out menus, keeping our apartment organized, making social arrangements, etc... he takes care of monthly bills, around the house handy-man things, and keeps me grounded. Overall it works.
- However, there should be equal emotional investment into the relationship. If one person is more invested in the relationship (read head over heels for the other person) and the other person less so (could give a rats a**) then the relationship is not going to work out. You deserve to be in a relationship with someone who will care for you as much as you care for them.
**Blogger Confessions is a new series that a few bloggers in the DC area have decided to participate in. It hopes to capture the multifaceted lives that many bloggers live in, but sometimes is not highlighted in our blogs.**